I fell in love with her cooking almost as quickly as I did her son.
Ok, actually maybe my love for her cooking came first?
Milanesa's, Aticuchos, Ceviche.. homemade Salsa..
These meals she would teach me how to cook as my married years went on...
..... I haven't cooked those meals since the Divorce.
I don't know why, really.
I am sure there is some psychological reason, but in reality my biggest truth is I think cooking sucks.
Yet, I have eaten those dishes. My children have eaten those dishes. With her actually. I have sat at her table many a times since the divorce, and chowed down Peruvian Heaven. Actually, I do almost every time I visit up that way.
Some think it is strange, the relationship I have with her. The Mother to my ex husband. My "Ex Mother in Law". They think it odd I can sit in her home and eat like I am still her daughter in law... See..to me, I am. I didn't divorce her. I divorced her son. And, for whatever awesome reason.. she feels the same.
The great reality is she is My Children's "Mammacita", a name she prefers to Grandma.. as it makes her sound "old". She will always be. I am happy for that. While I can't cultivate and force a relationship with their Father (that's another blog post), I CAN support one from someone as willing and loving as their very own Mammacita. And, I do. With or without food.
To all of you with ex in-laws, or soon to be ex in-laws.
I encourage you to try and look beyond the hurt, perhaps betrayal, and even the feeling of abandonment from your own in laws. Realize, that of course naturally, they will side with their own child.. most of the time. That for a bit they may distance themselves, or push you away. It's a survival thing. Its a parent thing. It is normal! You have to remember that. Even if it is unfair, or even wrong.
But more often than not, they WILL come around.. Or if it is YOU, you will come around.
When you are both ready, which I hope doesn't take long as these are precious Grand-parenting years.. SUPPORT that relationship.
You don't have to sit at their table and eat dinner, although I am telling you it a fantastic benefit, just allow that relationship to rebuild. It is worth it. Your kids are worth it. I promise you.
Besides, someone has to teach your kids how to make the family recipe.
*The same love goes to Papacito. The quiet one.
****Below is the sweetest cutest text I received last night that inspired this little post.****
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